We're very lucky.
Jack is the sort of child
we all assume we'll have
when we decide to have children,
and the sort of child
less experienced parents
congratulate themselves for.January and February 2004
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Friday, Mar. 19, 2004 - Mamma
Mamma goofed last night.
Mamma *really* goofed. Just ask Jack.
Dad worked last night, and Mamma forgot to get the sling from the car before he left, and that just ruined the whole evening's routine.
OK, lets start back at the beginning. In the beginning, there were two different kinds of baby slings at our house: a mamma sling and a dad sling. A few days ago, I realized that Jack had outgrown the mamma sling, and I gave it to a pregnant friend.
That means that Mamma and Dad are now sharing a sling, but we're still getting the hang of that.
You see, Dad keeps his sling in the car, because he usually uses it when he and Jack go to the shops and on other adventures. They don't use it in the house much.
Mamma, on the other hand, generally keeps her sling at home, because she uses it frequently during the day, to get all sorts of chores done and sometimes just to play "hug a bub".
So, now that we're down to one sling, it was in the car because Dad had used it last.
Our evening routine, when Dad works, is that Jack and I will come home and nurse, and then we'll play with toys and books for an hour or two -- and then we get into the sling and we do chores - - we wash laundry, and tidy the flat, and start our evening meal.
Last night, when it came time to stop playing and do our chores... NO SLING! Oops.
Mamma delayed a while, reading some more books and trying to interest Jack in his toys again. But, no. Jack knew it was time to start chores. So, we went and started some laundry. But with no sling, he had to be in my arms, which was uncomfortable for both of us, so we tried Jack on the floor. No, he clung to my knees and cried. He wanted to be in the sling and couldn't imagine why I wasn't cooperating.
All evening, we struggled. I would try to get some chores done with Jack in my arms -- he would wiggle and try to "help" -- meaning that there were many things I couldn't do safely. So, I'd put him on the floor for a moment, and he'd pull himself up on my knees and cry.
Poor Jack.
But even going back to the toys didn't help! Those were boring, and it was time to do chores!
Oh dear.
The total tally of the destruction wrought by our frustrated boy was two books of poetry, one box of facial tissue, and three potatoes ruined. We also had two moderately harrased cats and four well-chewed candles.
It was so distressing to him that poor Jack wanted to go to bed two hours early. We compromised -- I drew it out as long as I could and finally began his bedtime routine an hour early. (We didn't need a little ray of sunshine lighting our world at 4am!)
Now, Mamma is looking into buying a second larger sling, quickly!
It's amazing. For nearly a half century, the world has tried to put Rod and I on some sort of predictable schedule. Within a few months, our tiny tyrant has managed what no one else ever could before. Not only are we on a schedule, we're actually enjoying it!
And last night also gives me reason to rethink my ideas about Continuum parenting...although I still think that the promised results are romantic and unrealistic, I must say that the basic ideas seems to be well in keeping with Jack's view of how a child wants to be raised. He didn't want to be the center of attention, but he wanted to be at the center of the action. It wasn't good enough for me to play with him, he wanted to "help" with the chores that pretty much define adult life. I stuck him in the sling to do the chores because it makes us both happy to cuddle and chat while I go about the mindlessness of keeping house -- I hadn't really thought about the fact that when he's in the sling and can see what I'm doing, he is remarkably quiet and alert. I can even use a knife or wash the dishes with hot water without his reaching for it...not something I would ever try again after last night if he weren't in the sling!
Hmmm. The things we learn!
